Full Body Experience

Tonight I had the most amazing singing lesson.

My voice is usually thin and quivery which makes me feel less than confident up on the stage singing at church. It doesn't help that the worship leader often tells me to smile more and to "go up to hit the high notes." To top it off I am usually about a head taller than any of the other singers on stage which brings up my height insecurity. So there are many reasons for my singing anxiety.

But tonight my voice was rich and full. It sparkled. It resonated! It was vibrant!!! I couldn't believe it was coming out of my mouth. My teacher had me do all these crazy exercises to get my body involved in singing. Surprisingly, singing is a full body experience. He says my head is not well connected to the rest of my body (which doesn't bode well for me in other arenas of life...)

I sang standing with my back against a wall. I sang while pushing with all might might against a wall. Hands on my head. Hands pressing air down like I was pushing myself up out of a pool. Arms swinging and gesturing like a shakespearean actor. That did the trick. As long as I throw my arms around wildly and imagine I'm singing out the back of my head I sound fantastic!

Truly, I sang like I have never sang before. It was thrilling. And yet I felt so vulnerable at the same time. Singing like that is like opening yourself up and sharing something inside of you that, at least for now for me, feels pretty intimate. I never thought singing would be this intense.

Can you picture me throwing my arms about on stage with the worship team? But, you know, baby steps, baby steps. For now I guess I'll just sound fantastic in my room and at my singing lessons. Until I learn how to embody the whole shakespearean thing without whacking the vocalist next to me.